Round 5

So it occurs to me that (a) I haven't posted in a week, (b) it seems I only watch my favorite movies like The Matrix [really, the first one is the most fun -- has it truly been 10 years since it came out?!] or The Lord of the Rings when I surf across them on TNT [and apparently, it's Hugo Weaving night on TNT], and (c) those dystopian machines-rule-the-world movies like Terminator Salvation [wait for video... or a bargain matinee, I say] have really illogical premises -- why keep people as batteries? is it really that effective/cheaper, really? and WHY does Skynet want to wipe out all humans?! -- but I suppose (b) and (c) are unanswerable, at least if you're not an unhealthily obsessed fan-geek.

Coincidentally, Neo just barfed onscreen right now, as if he had just endured a bad round of chemo. (Has Morpheus always been this pompous, by the way?!)

Thus, I will address that which I can at least claim has some more interest to you, dear reader, than my midnight ramblings -- i.e., my medical update.

Today was round 5 of 8 in chemo-land. Generally speaking, it was fine and dandy. Mostly. (We'll get to the caveat in a minute.) The oncologist and I were both pretty pleased by the lack of fever this round, so YAY! We're both hoping this means that my body has become used to the constant round of insults and attacks, and that going forward, this means each round will be endurable -- or at least without a trip to the ER.

The only problem is that (sorry, guy friends, icky girl stuff coming up) the chemo seems to have totally screwed up my, um, "biological clock" -- to put it euphemistically. So now, instead of one week of messiness, and 3 weeks of rest, it seems I generally have THREE weeks of yuck, and ONE week of rest -- I feel like I am ALWAYS having my period! Argh! This includes the attendant mood swings, food cravings, and bloating, etc. Fun, fun, fun. Of course, the oncologist also pointed out that it could just merely be early perimenopause [at 41?!], and not just because of the drugs -- although the drugs apparently DO sometimes have this effect. Feh.

This weird cycle stuff could also possible explain the follicles (psuedo-cystlike formations) they found in my left ovary at last week's ultrasound, (ordered by my new onco) since it is not unusual for menstruating women to have them at some point in each cycle (ah, the bliss of ignorance). Follow up ultrasound of the uterine area to be done in 6 weeks, thereby continuing my odd mirroring of my pregnant pals.

( Okay, important stuff coming up ) It could also explain why the new onco found a big lumpy area in my RIGHT boob. What is this? The bonus round?! We're hoping that it is just my boob being it's usual dense and lumpy self (apparently, density is so confusing that the other nurses were amazed that my surgeon had to send me for an MRI before the lumpectomy in order to locate the tumor since he normally NEVER needs the visual aid) and that the endless periods are just causing temporary unhappiness in the breast tissue. If the lump is still there at my next chemo round, then more mammos, ultrasounds, and biopsies lie in my future.

I choose to believe that the big lumpy area is just period-related, and not cancerous (although I honestly can't remember if they took a mammo of my right boob in December... wouldn't they have seen it then?! So I'm guessing no, or it would be in my file... Either that, or my onco will go find it in my file after today's visit -- maybe I should call her office tomorrow to check). In any case, (a) I won't worry about it unless it's still there in 3 weeks, and (b) life wouldn't be THAT cruel... would it?

Really, I'm not too worried about it (one road bump at a time, people -- chemo round 5 is staring me in the face right now), but it makes me not too eager to go get the BRCA gene test approved by my health insurer so that I can take the test. (See: bliss of ignorance, above.)

Okay, I'm going to go watch a hot, buff, young Keanu Reeves on TV now. We were both a decade younger then. Funky.

Since you don't have that, and may actually find him an unappealing mouthbreather (hi, Margaret!) I leave you with these beautiful flowers from my sister's yard instead. Fun family news in my next posting. Promise.